Grown-ups?

When can we say we are grown-ups?

Is it when we turn a certain age? Or when we move away from our parents? When we have a steady relationship?


I don't have an answer to that. I went away to university at 18, am slowly closing on 30, still have a few exams left, several years of work experience under my belt, as well as a few kilograms too many, have battled depression fairly successfully, and had no life partner untill a bit over a year ago.

Call it what you like it...

For me, I have never felt grown up, feel as if I was 24 for some time now, even though I am working 9-5, take work home, provide for myself, do my own taxes etc. (Still feel like I have on idea what they want from me, though.)

The point I was slooowly getting to was: lately, I've been getting flashes of "Omg, this is just like being an adult!" and feel like a little kid playing dressing up as an adult, trying to fake it without a clue as to how it's really done.

Most often it happens while talking to my Viking, working things out. Distance relationship requires a lot of communication, and I tend to clamp up.

Usually, he is a typicall male, oblivious to anything that isn't marked with flashing neon pointers. But sometimes he suprises me greatly with the perfect words of love and reassurance, showing me my fears in broad daylight, where they shrivel up and run away to sulk in the darkest corner, ashamed.

He is so kind, loving and gentle, the sun rises warm and bright in my soul and heart when I look into his beautifull speckled eyes.


I think I might just grow up a bit for us.
Just a bit. The inner kid needs TLC too ;-)

J. ä. d.


P.S. This is the first time I'll try and post from my mobile. Handy at 4am :-D

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